HELP SAVE A MARRIAGE

After spending the better part of my adulthood totally against marriage, I baffled my family and my friends when I went and got married last year. I truly believe my husband and I can have a great marriage despite the negativity around most marriages we see. I'm sad to see so many of our friends now getting divorces or giving up on their marriages. My sister, for example, gave up on her marriage long ago because she feels her husband is selfish with his time. While he still lives his life as he did when he was single she stays at home looking after the house and kids. She has become so angry that she has trouble saying anything nice to him.

Another couple I know fights all the time because she feels he puts his work before her. She wants to be the first priority in his life and she is angry she isn't. And he is angry since he feels he has to choose between them.

They just celebrated their 12th anniversary. Some very close friends of mine have a great marriage but they are in such financial debt that it has put a huge strain on their relationship. She has to stay home with their baby so he is the lone breadwinner for the first time in their marriage. She has become frustrated since he seems to spend more then he makes. I'm not an expert but I hope that I can learn from these couple to help make my marriage stronger. After doing some research what my friends and family are experiencing is quite common. Their marriages are strained because:

1. kids
2. trying to fix up a home
3. have grown apart from lack of communication
4. have no quality time for each other because of kids or work
5. one of them is suffocating the other

I know there are a number of other reasons and the problems aren't that simple. Some of these problems stem from some deep-rooted resentment. How can I help save my marriage before these issues become our problems? Are my friends doomed to divorce or can they help save their marriages? Author of "Save My Marriage Today", Amy Waterman states, "You may not believe this, but very few marriages reach the point of separation or divorce without being pushed along that path by both partners. Both of you influence each other in ways that may not even be visible. That's why it is so crucial that you look at why your marriage is in crisis. Even a tiny change in your attitude, actions, or lifestyle can completely change the dynamic of your marriage. You have enormous power ... but only if you know how to use it."

So it's never to late, couples can bounce back. Wouldn't it be easier to help save a marriage instead of destroying it? My husband is my best friend, a best friend I never want to lose.